Hi, did you see solar eclipse
sweeping cross around your hometown?
You must be there with her right?
Did you remember something?
It
was a super rare moment for the moon and the sun met. Like us. Our brief story,
which is rare and beauty. I never thought before, we met, knew well each other,
shared laughs, mad, sad, or silly stuffs together, until I know what is that
love people used to say.
No one ever touch my heart like you
did to me. You never said anything about falling in love with me, sometimes it
made doubt, sorry. But how did you treat me is more than love that you have to
say.
Hi Dawne, we meet again at the
campus corridor. But you still were pretending not to see me around you Dawne.
Did
it very hurt for you Dawne? But the truth, I do feel the same way, Dawn.. But
you could not understand..
What
did you think every time you walked this corridor away, Dawn? Did you think the
same? No, I guess you didn't. But I always think about the first time you
called my name from the corner of the students room, and I walked closer to
you, then you gave me your relative's wedding souvenir, you said that I must be
need that thing someday. What a funny of you Dawn, but I was happy to keep it,
and it was the very first time you show me that very sweet and kind smile.
Do you remember that?
I
was missing you Dawne, like the dawn never being there every morning... I miss
the time you called me phone in the dawn to wake me up, then I said yes I
already woke up, then you turned your phone off, 10 minutes later you called me
again convinced me to get up and to prepare for the morning life. Dawne, if
only you know that I always pretend to snooze so you must be call me back later
and I could hear your smooth whisper which makes me tickled and smile every time
you did that. I love the way you love me was Dawn...
And I hate to be like this, now.
Long
time no chat with you, Dawne. I wish you very good day every day. You still did
not want to talk to me Dawn, even just were rolling your eyes to me but you
didn't do it ever again.
You
know, I miss you...
I
know it was very deep painful after what I've done to you, to choose him as my
boyfriend than you, Dawn. I didn't know why did I say yes for his relationship
question. Now I know it's just my ambition to be with a boy who has been
admired by me for a year. But my deepest heart is still yours, Dawn.
I
know we never make a sweet first impression like those fairy tales used to
share. But, I do miss that moment so much..
When
I thought you were a boring-careless-bad-boy, who always ignore my smiling face
and humble greetings from me every time we met, how shit were you Dawne!
I
remembered it well, the day you talked to me at the first time by your swagger
intonation of speaking. I do really hate you at that time. I didn't know how it
start to be love actually Dawn, but you had stole my whole heart, and I don't
know how to find a new one for me, Dawn.
I
wish you still keep it on somewhere else and you will return home with that, or
you just give me that thing and home away to her, yes, her...
You have already been her, and
I should have not missed you,
Dawne. That's my fault.
Good day, Dawne.
Hey, Dawne…
Did
you know when we were eating the triple portion of delicious meatballs just two
of us? at that very fun evening I ever felt, with your unique way to eat that
meatballs and I felt home, we did not ever care what would they think of us, I
just want you to know, I was very happy at that time, thanks.
Did
you remember when you gave me a very tiny bouquet of Edelweis flower the night
you arrived at the campus and we had our coffee together? I was very happy to
know you home safely, the 10-days without you here was very boring days I've
ever lived. I also got mad because you've broken your promises not to pick everything
from the mountain, but thanks from that I know that I really mean something for
you. But you've promised me not to pick them anymore, never.
I
was a little bit worry when you asked me to kidnap myself somewhere. We bought
some milks and yogurts and you took me up to the top of the hill, the
beauty-comfy place I've ever been. I could see the panorama of Bandung and
Lembang. I closed my eyes and breathe, and you were just smiling at me I know
that you did at that time. We had our milks and yogurt, you always know what I
wanted and what I need. And you played the Melati Suci's Song from your phone.
You said that you started to like me at that time, and then you just forgot
what you've said by talking about other things, but I really want you to ask
me, so I would say, I feel the same way you know, but you never asked me.
There
are so much things that we left behind. I do remember every single moment
because no one ever been like that before.
You
said, "I will not wait you at the summit, but I will beside you since your
first step made." You know what? That words become familiar yet mainstream
in nowadays, hahaha I am happy to be the very first to hear that words from you
before.
You
said, "You always know my unspoken passions, although I not seem to
care." Yeah, you did the same way like I did to you, but the fact we're
not home yet, or we never know what is His plan for us.
You
said that, "I am grateful to meet you, to know you, to love you.. Whatever
the ends be.."
But you never asked me. Why.. So, I
just want you to know.. I love you Mr. Sun, no one could accept me like you
did, no one would ever been interest, admire, and waiting for my written works
and my letter, no one could bring me home like you did to me..
I
know it was my fault, to leave you to get closer with him, and I just realized
it was just my ambition to get what I wanted for a year but, everyday every
night changes but in my deepest heart I always think about you, I did not mean
to hurt you, but you hurt so much, I'm sorry for everything. Until you decide
to be stranger. And it is really hurt, I wish we could be very best friends but
you can't, even you just read my Line message without reply it, a thousand
sorry will never ever been healed your pain Dawne, maybe I just should leave
you and let you go.
Those
years told me to forgive myself and to forgive you…
I'm
so lonely, no one can understand me now. Maybe it is because I always keep myself
alone and always compare them with you. I know it's wrong. And people are
different, you always be the best for me, but in other side there must be someone
or others who will be the best in their own ways.
Like
the solar eclipse which has very brief moment to share with others. Like our
brief story which hopefully can inspiring others. Very brief, close, warm, and
beauty. We always together, in our side, shining and brighting.
I
wish you very happy with her every day. This is will be my last letter for you.
This solar eclipse moment will be the sign of our story end. Thank you so much
for being the best and meaningful for me and for makes me being meaningful and
the best for you too.
With
love, your little moon.
